


For Death Knows No Reason, Only Time

by swancharmings



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Gen, The X-Files Revival, the x files AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-01 23:22:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6540925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swancharmings/pseuds/swancharmings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"She died, honey." "Why?" "She was very, very sick." William asks about the sister he never got to meet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For Death Knows No Reason, Only Time

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this while I was supposed to be doing a million other things, but it kept flowing so I kept writing. I've had this in my head for a while now, and I finally wrote it down. Ouch. 
> 
> Also, I don't know if this has been done before, but here's my take on it.
> 
> Also also, I didn't make William any specific age in this, but it's AU where they kept him and raised him, and I would say he's somewhere between 4 and 6, but you decide :)

They walked down the gravel path in silence. Scully held William’s tiny hand in her own, and he flexed his fingers against hers with nervous energy as they continued up the hill.

She still came every year, but never with William in tow. Her mother usually watched him while she and Mulder made the trip. But he’d wanted to come, he’d been insistent, and she couldn’t say no. As much as she didn’t want to inflict this pain upon him – she wasn’t even sure he totally understood the concept, yet – she could not deny him this.

“Who is Emily?” his small, inquisitive voice had asked over breakfast, around bites of oatmeal with marshmallow dinosaurs.

Scully nearly dropped her coffee mug and Mulder had to rest his hand on her shoulder to steady her.

“Where did you hear that name?” Mulder asked him as casually as he could, after about a full minute where he realized Scully wasn’t going to be offering an answer anytime soon.

William shrugged noncommittally. “I got up to go to the bathroom last night and you guys were talking out here still. Was she my sister?”

Scully had recovered, but her eyes were glazed over as she pulled out the kitchen chair next to her son and sat down. It made a scraping sound against the tile that cut through the solemn silence.

“Yes. Yes, she was,” she answered him, forcing a smile onto her face.

“Where is she?” William’s brow furrowed.

Scully swallowed past the lump in her throat and took his small hand in both her own, rubbing her thumb gently over his knuckles. “She’s not here anymore. She died, honey. She’s up in Heaven.”

“Oh.” William was silent, trying to process this. Scully felt the gaping hole in her heart open up. She wasn’t ready for this conversation. She wasn’t sure that she had ever wanted to have this conversation with William in the first place, and definitely not when he was still this young. But of course, she should have suspected he’d be overtly curious. She only wished she didn’t have to explain death to him at such a young age. He shouldn’t have to experience this.

She looked up at Mulder and the expression she saw on his face broke her resolve even more. He knew what losing a sister was like. And he certainly didn’t want his son to have to feel that pain.

“Why?” William’s voice withdrew Scully from her reverie.

“What, sweetie?”

“Why did she die?”

Scully’s throat constricted and closed, and she tried to force the words to come. William’s wide eyes looked up at her, expectant yet patient. He seemed to understand the gravity of the situation, and she was equal parts grateful and saddened by this.

“She was very, very sick,” Scully said finally, squeezing his hand. “But…she’s in a better, happier place now, and she’s not sick anymore.”

William nodded, turning his eyes back down to his now cold and sodden oatmeal.

Scully’s heart broke. For both of her children.

“It’s okay to cry, honey. Okay? If you feel sad, if you feel like crying, it’s okay to feel that way. You can let it out, it’s okay.”

William nodded again and looked back up at her. “Can I go see her? With you?”

“I—“ Scully was taken aback and looked up at Mulder. He cleared his throat and nodded, stepping forward to run his hand lightly through William’s hair.

“Of course, buddy,” he said, and began moving his hand up and down Scully’s back. She was grateful for the comfort.

And so here they were, standing before Emily’s tombstone, engraved simply yet elegantly with a lily flower, her name and the dates of her birth and death.

Mulder came up behind them, having dropped them off while he found a parking spot along the street. He took Scully’s hand and gave it a reassuring and comforting squeeze while William sat down in front of the grave.

Scully watched, eyes brimming with tears as he traced the E of her name. He’d always been a very tactile child. 

Then he began to talk to her.

“Hi, Emily.” A pause. “I’m your little brother.”

Scully choked down a sob.

“You never got to meet me, ‘cause you’re up in Heaven. It sounds nice there. I hope you’re not lonely, but I don’t think you are, ‘cause you’re s’posed to never feel lonely in Heaven.”

William pulled his favorite astronaut figure out of his jacket pocket and propped it up against the headstone.

“But if you are, I want you to have this. So you can have something to remember me by.”

Silent tears ran down Scully’s cheeks. The thought came before she could stop it. _He would have been such a great brother._

William was quiet for a long time. Then he started chattering away about a whirlwind of topics, from what his favorite foods were, to how he didn’t like his gym teacher very much, to how Mommy and Daddy were doing.

“We might get a dog soon,” William continued, resituating himself on the hard dirt. “Do you like dogs? I like dogs. I like all animals. I thought an iguana would be really cool, but Mommy said no.”

She had to laugh at that.

“Fun crusher,” Mulder whispered in her ear. She smiled and wiped her eyes on his sleeve.

“But they said I can name the dog,” he went on. He paused again. “If it’s a girl dog, I want to name it Emily, like you.”

Mulder gripped her hand impossibly tighter and she tried to control a fresh wave of tears.

“But I don’t wanna replace you, either,” William frowned, laying a small hand on top of the headstone.

Scully couldn’t stand it anymore. She crouched down to his level and pulled him into an awkward hug against her side.

“I don’t think she’d mind at all,” Scully whispered, placing a kiss on the side of his head. “In fact, I think she’d love it.”

“Really?” William asked, sniffling a little.

“Really.” Scully stood and helped him up with her. “And that was really nice of you to give her that. She’ll love that, too.” She nodded down at his astronaut figure.

“Good.” William looked up at her and noticed her tear-stained face. “Are you okay, Mommy?”

“Yes,” she laughed a little, wiping at her eyes. “Yes, I’m okay.”

And she meant it.

“Come on, let’s go home.” She took his hand and caught Mulder’s eye. They shared a brief look of silent understanding before he moved to William’s side and grabbed hold of his other hand.

“We’ll come back next year, right?”

Scully smiled and swung their hands back and forth. “Always.”


End file.
